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Who am I?

Susan Williams


Named "Bulldog" by Scott Stenberg.

Named "The Kayak Hunter" by Jeffrey Pringle.

Named "Alpha Kayak Femme" by Steve Corbett.

Named "Pitbull" by Cliff Roach.

Named "General Susan" by Stephen Petrie.

Named "Paddling Poet Lawyerette" by Jeff Bartges.

Named "The Paddling Machine" by Chris Beckman.

When paddling K-2, named one of the "Satanic Doublemint twins," "Syncopated Satanettes," "Doublemint Devilettes," and "Titian Twin Terrors" by John Pescatore.

Mostly everyone else just calls me crazy.

952 Statute Miles Paddled in 2008 (paddling season ended two months early).
1,157 Statute Miles Paddled in 2007.
1,137 Statute Miles Paddled in 2006.

My Boats:

And yes I do use all of them.
I need a cardboard sign, "Will do legal work for kayaks."

My Pennkayaking Personal Ad (by the way this is meant as a joke!):

I'm Susan, better known as "S," "You're an animal," or "Are you swimming ... again?" I'm a capricorn, which explains why I keep getting back on my ski. My turn-ons are guys in black Underarmour and any guy who has something longer than 19' and knows how to use it. I like a guy who can paddle me hard but still be a gentleman and put my boat up on my van when we're finished. If you know how to gelcoat and own a GPS, you just might be the one.

My Quotes:

"Now that my barn has burned down, I can see the moon." -Duke Fisher, fellow 70-Miler paddler

"Pain is weakness leaving the body." -Saki

"Hana ka hoe, pa'a ka waha" or, basically, "shut up and paddle."

"I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, you can't prove anything." -Bart Simpson

"The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud." -Coco Chanel

"No law ever written has stopped any robber, rapist or killer, like cold blue steel in the hands of their last intended victim." -W. Emerson Wright

"It's great to win, but it's also great fun just to be in the thick of any truly well and hard fought contest against opponents you respect, whatever the outcome." -Jack Nicklaus

Susan's ladyjustice Link To 2008-2009 Races

CLICK HERE FOR LIST OF 2009 RACES - If you have a race to add, let me know and I'll gladly post it here.

Susan's ladyjustice Kayak and Surfski Race and Trip Reports






Susan's ladyjustice Dragonboat Race Reports

Susan's ladyjustice miscellaneous ramblings and reports

Susan's ladyjustice 70 mile General Clinton Race Training Diaries

The longest single day flat water canoe race in the world. A grueling 70 mile test of endurance, stamina, and canoeing skills. The General Clinton 70 mile race took place on Memorial Day 2007. Then I did it again on Memorial Day 2008.

Susan's ladyjustice Resume

Susan's ladyjustice Favorite Links

Susan's ladyjustice More Photos

Susan's ladyjustice Things That Sound Dirty In Paddlesports But Aren't

You left your sponge in there.
Nice rack!!!
When I say "Hut-ho", we'll switch.
Mine's longer by a couple inches.
I have to buy more tie-downs.
You need to lengthen your stroke.
She's one of the fastest women I know!
I find neoprene too constricting.
Let's roll over a few more times and call it a night!
It's a tight fit, but if I wiggle I can get in.
He was riding my ass for hours.
I'm switching partners next time.
I need a smaller shaft.
I'm going to hit the Assawoman this weekend.
I did it with a partner last year, but I'm doing it solo this year.
She's always willing to go out with a group of guys.
Steve has a much faster stroke rate than me.
She's got some cosmetic blemishes, but she rides real nice.
He asked me to pick him up a new skirt.
What? Nobody here paddles a stripper?
Paddling gets me wet.

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DISCLAIMER: Paddling is an inherently dangerous sport. This website’s information is provided with the understanding that the providers are not engaged in rendering advice on technical matters, equipment performance, safety, or any other aspect of the sport in absolute terms or advocating any of the techniques or experiences described.